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Capturing our love for art, adventure and learning

Am 1 a failure? (Let's Break the Cycle)

7/12/2023

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Feeling like a failure is a crushing feeling that many are familiar with.

"Look at so-and-so, they have achieved XYZ, what have you achieved?"
"This thing you are doing? You'll never amount to anything"
"Everyone has done this, why can't you?"
"Wish you could be like your sibling..."
"You MUST do this, I'll be really disappointed if you are the only one in the family that don't achieve this!" 
"I will only buy you this toy/thing if you achieve THIS"


We've probably heard these things in different forms at some point of our lives. These are made of bone crushing and spirit breaking stuff. They have the power put us on course towards the excruciating abyss of a lifetime of self-pity and depression. And yet, such thoughts are found in the very heads that it traumatised. So many of us find ourselves continuing the cycle of hurt that we so detest. 

Background
We've been homeschooling for almost 8 years. It has been a highly rewarding AND reflective journey. Although it wasn't a decision taken lightly, many questioned and doubted our choice. You see, Debra and I grew up in an immensely stressful education system and culture. It is a land where success and one's value is very narrowly defined. It is a system where many children wake up from 530am and only stop school related activities at 10pm before bed time. It is a country of just over half a million school going kids (7 to 16) but they generate S$1.68 billion (£1 billion/USD1.25 billion) annually for the private tuition industry. Growing number of parents go as far as purchasing multi-million dollar properties to secure places in "better schools" to ensure success for their children. The Programme for International Student Assessment (PISA) rankings is almost validation of the pressure put on children. Singapore is ranked second in the world for reading literacy, mathematics, and science in 2018. Despite the stellar results, there is a shocking amount of people that grow up feeling like a failure. This extreme fear of not measuring up and not achieving enough is encapsulated in a word so famous that the Oxford dictionary incorporated it: KIASU.

One of our greatest motivation for homeschooling our children is our desire to break this cycle of trauma. We saw and experienced the pain as students and former teachers in the public education system. We didn’t want to raise unhappy children that loathed learning, loathed life and loathed themselves. 

These are perhaps the 3 most salient lessons I've learnt from 8 years of teaching my own children and in that process unlearning what I've been told. 

1. It is okay to fail.

Not achieving success is a highly uncomfortable experience. Nobody likes to fail. This gives us even more reasons to respond kindly when someone experiences failure. If we were to break the cycle of trauma, we have to learn to accept that failures are experienced. Failure is an experience that DOES NOT define us.


2. Don't compare, compare. 

The problem is not comparison. The problem lies in the ranking and judging that follows comparison. It is intellectual indolence to define people simply by looking at their wealth, status or grades. If human life is precious, we must surely agree that its worth cannot be defined by what that life has achieved or not.

It is inevitable that parents compare their children with their siblings or other children. We compare our children too. Comparison should help you see how unique your child is. Comparison should help you understand them as an individual. Comparison should help us discover their strengths and weaknesses and inform us of the best way to facilitate learning.

Comparison is about understanding. Comparison is not for ranking or judgement. 


3. Love unconditionally

I hope I'll always make my children feel loved simply because I love them. I don't want them to ever feel like they need to please me with something before they are loved. It is manipulative and narcissistic to give gifts, love and affection only when your loved one can bring a success in exchange. We've seen many instances in our culture where one's worth is based on how much "honour" and "face" value you can bring to your family/parents/loved one. One should never have to experience "love" that is dependent on their achievements. 

Love is not self-seeking. 




Nobody is a failure just because they experience failure. No one should be made to feel like a failure and have their worth defined by comparison. No one should have to feel like they are a failure that don't deserve love because they did not achieve something. ​

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Reduced to tears

6/30/2023

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10 years ago, Vincent and Debra were on their honeymoon. Vincent was also on a quest to show Debra the home of his heart, mind and soul.  He decided that visiting a sleepy Welsh town called Dolgellau was a great idea. He didn't even know how to pronounce the name correctly. It was a rather peculiar plan for a honeymoon considering it was in the middle of a cold dark and windy winter. There was nothing to do and only a really expensive Chinese take-out was open by 4pm. If you consider all these factors and Debra's deep disdain of the wind, Dolgellau is a poor choice. 

To make up for that, Vincent took Debra on a drive down a path with many sheep and....field gates that she had to open by exiting the comforts of the car's warm heated seats. I bet she wasn't too impressed. As the windy path got really narrow and steep, Vincent fiddled with the manual gears of his rented Citroen wishing it was an automatic. At this point it could have really just ended with them not finding anything worth looking at and grumbling their way back to the hotel. It could have been one of those wasted trips that they would put behind them...
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What they chanced upon at the end of the path was Cregennan Lakes. It was magical. In an instance, both Vincent and Debra fell deeply in love with the land. Apart from the wind and drizzle that cut short that magical moment, work was filling up their emails and it was time to head back to their daily grind on the equator. Ready at the gate for their 13.5 hour flight back, they were surprised that British Airways had upgraded them to business class. The bigger surprise was they were now three instead of two. 

The years that follow were hectic. Debra and Vincent pushed themselves far beyond what most people would consider sane. They built a family and a business but a deep subconscious yearning for that place they can feel at home remained. Vincent would always tell Debra, "I miss home". But that didn't make sense. He had a loving home. When Vincent's dad suddenly went home to be with the Lord, nothing made sense anymore. What is home? 

They embarked on a grand tour that would help them learn more about themselves, their children and what they were going to do with their lives...
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7 months of travel later, they published a book, and this was one of the pages. They continued to dream of the land they would call home.

"It's been 10 years, just give up already..."
"Know when it is time to give up!"

These voices got louder and louder and it became immensely difficult to dream again. 

But here is Vincent, Debra, Matthias and Gwyneth in Dolgellau. It took 10 years but here they are.
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Eateries, shops and the town felt alive. 4 of them felt alive! Especially with the delicious cheese cakes and full English that filled their tummies. 
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FOOD MAKES HER SMILE
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FOOD MAKES HER SMILE TOO
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The best lemon pistachio cheesecake I've ever had.
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Just like the previous time, Vincent wrangled a little Citroen up the really steep hills and tiny country roads. And as the lakes came into view, he played the Welsh hymn that has been playing all week at home. As Calon Lân ​played on the car stereo, there was silence in the car...

English translation:

I don't ask for a luxurious life,
the world's gold or its fine pearls,
I ask for a happy heart,
an honest heart, a pure heart.

A pure heart full of goodness
Is fairer than the pretty lily,
None but a pure heart can sing,
Sing in the day and sing in the night.

If I wished for worldly wealth,
It would swiftly go to seed;
The riches of a virtuous, pure heart
Will bear eternal profit.

Evening and morning, my wish
Rising to heaven on the wing of song
For God, for the sake of my Saviour,
To give me a pure heart.
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As Vincent parked the car in the exact spot he parked 10 years ago, nobody moved. The stillness and silence in the car was in fact a guise to the fact that Debra and Vincent were both reduced to tears looking out of the window. The stillness did not reflect the immeasurable deluge of emotions. Both of them were suddenly and unexpectedly hit with the feeling of homecoming at that moment. Without saying a word to each other, they both felt the same incredible emotions. It took a really long time, but it finally felt right and complete. 

Having explored the place for themselves, the kids surprised their parents by asking them to take them there every day. 

"It takes a long time to drive here you know..."
"You can look for a house and we can stay here!"

They have all found their happy place. May this be their happily ever after...
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The sun was too much for her eyes haha!
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An extraordinary afternoon later, they travelled down to the estuary that Vincent chanced upon while exploring the area via Google street view. The place looked strangely familiar. 

They drank in remembrance of their beloved dad and grandad.
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This is our story of homecoming.
What's yours?
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Summer Bumper Post: We surrender

6/14/2023

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Our first British Summer is finally here. We've been out and about making the best of the dry weather and long days. Britain is GORGEOUS in summer! We hope you'll enjoy the 60 plus photos that'll come up in this bumper post. More than that I'd like to share a little of why we are surrendering. We are putting up the white flag.

SURRENDER 1.1 
Finally after 6 months, we have touched the sea again. We surrendered to the lure of the sea and being able to dress in shorts/t-shirt again. I think more than that is the fact we are back at a place we visited 10 years ago and were disappointed because it was closed. This is a recurring theme that I'll talk about in detail later. 

Brighton beach is my kind of beach. Instead of the regular sand, there are pebbles instead. No messy cleanups. Just strolling down the beach and enjoying the sea breeze brought smiles to all our faces. The pier is also an amazing place if you enjoy bumper cars and old school roller-coasters. The British seaside charm is a very unique experience that you can only fully experience in summer. It comes alive in summer and hibernates in winter. 
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This image appeared in a dream long many years back. I was a little shocked when I reviewed the picture on the camera screen.
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Touching the sea again. It was COLD.
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An almost 4hr drive down to the South Coast of England
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T-shirts, shorts and summer dresses.
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Fair rides
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A short drive away down the Marine Parade was a series of white cliffs. The famed cliffs that inspired the song "The White Cliffs of Dover". Although this isn't dover,  it still evoked a moment of deep reflection. This was one of the last things we saw before Debra and I left the UK on our honeymoon 10 years ago. ​It was so stunning we were speechless. 
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SURRENDER 1.2
With the dry weather going strong, we planned another trip a few days after returning from the South Coast. With our snack bag and lunch packs done up, we booked tickets to a museum in London and punched in the address on google maps. 1 hour into the drive, we hit the first of several traffic jams on the motorway. A quick time check made us realise that we can't take the kids to the play area and museum anymore. "Plan B then!" I thought to myself. We parked the car and realised that the cable-car station we planned to go to wasn't where we thought it was. It was a 20 minute walk away and we decided against picking a fight with the blazing hot sun. We surrendered. We quickly consulted google maps again and decided to take the river bus down the thames towards the most central areas of London. We were ALL thrilled with the speed and power of the boat as well as the awesome views. It was a special perspective to see the city from the Thames itself. 

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The London skyline by the Thames
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You may be thinking...the UK can't be hotter than the tropics? Thing is, a lot of British homes and  public transport aren't built to deal with the heat. At 27 celcius it can feel like you are suffocating. Fans and air-conditioners DO NOT come standard in houses, buses and Underground trains. It can be a pretty miserable experience if you are in a packed train on the London Underground without air-conditioning. House windows usually come with very small openings. It is mostly a small narrow opening at the top. So we've been flying the white flag lately hoping for the colder days to come back. Life can be SO ironic isn't it?

On this trip, we have also surrendered our money at the Leicester Square Lego store. The selection at the store is massive. If you love Lego, you'll be amazed at the Aston Martin, London bus and Harry Potter themed life sized displays. We decided to get the kids very early birthday presents. Debra got a custom Lego figure that is seriously her alter-ego. Maybe when the kids are grown up, I'll be hanging out with a wife with neon pink hair at the beach. (Scroll down for example...)
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They do custom mini-figures in store! you can select what's printed on the figure, choose the head and hair styles!

After a long day of amazing sights and shopping, we needed a good dinner. I knew Din Tai Fung would satisfy all of us. It has been 6 long months since we last had a Chinese restaurant meal. We surrendered to the "wok hey", chili oil and baos. I think that the experience is a bittersweet one because my late-father loved Din Tai Fung. It was his last birthday meal and last restaurant meal. The meal stirred up memories and we all also wished my mom was in the UK enjoying it with us. It tasted extra good after a long day of braving the jams, crowds and the heat. We did however have to surrender £75 (SGD 126.93, USD 94.60). 
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The ride back to our car on the Elizabeth Line was a lot quieter and air-conditioned. We were greeted by a mesmerising sunset. 

SURRENDER 1.3
I think this is the biggest and most significant part of our surrender. Earlier, I spoke about the recurring theme of surrendering. At some point, one will realise how brutal life can be. There are moments that will completely wreck havoc in our lives. Just like a traffic jam or sudden closure, it can upset our plans. 10 years ago when Debra and I felt the disappointment of not being able to see Brighton Pier and South Stack Light house, I don't think we realised 10 very hard years were before us. 

Whether you call it God's plans, fate or just life, it takes a certain level of surrender to keep going. We need to realise that quite often, not everything can be planned or controlled. We dreamt and we planned in search of a homeland we would find wholesome for a family but the search was long and fruitless. The pandemic and my dad's passing rocked us real hard. The only way we could stay sane was when we surrendered and took one day at a time. 

Being back in North Wales at the South Stack Lighthouse was a very special moment. 
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He said he was calling my late dad to join us...
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We learnt that what makes a light house special is not the bulb. The bulb is actually a regular household bulb. It is the lens that makes the light go far. Food for thought: Sometimes it is the perspective and not our ability that determines our success.

​We would never imagine that we will be here 10 years later with two children. It is extra special because after our trip here 10 years ago, we found out we were pregnant with Matthias. The beauty of Wales made such a huge impact that 3 years after that, I decided name my daughter Gwyneth which is the anglicised spelling of Gwynedd. Gwynedd is the Welsh county where Snowdonia is. That's also where our love affair with mountains began. How our lives are panning out now is beyond our wildest imagination. I believe in surrendering now. This surrender can bring a lot of peace. Putting away the pride and having faith that one day, things will work for our good keeps us going. 
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We climbed more than a 1100 steps....it was intense to say the least.
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A seagull and its chick.
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Looks like a piece of crumpled paper. But it is actually the sea with seabirds hanging out...
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The sea bashes the rocks and the winds assault the cliffs but seabird colonies continue to thrive. The rain lashes out but the flowers still bloom. The resilience in nature and its staggering beauty of remind us that out of the immense pressures something good will emerge! If you're facing a difficult time, don't give up.
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The light will guide you home

​We ended our time in Wales around Great Orme in Llandudno. Gwyn enjoyed the views so much that she asked Debra and I if we could buy a house there so she can enjoy the views every day. Perhaps darling...perhaps. 
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A playground with a view
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We'll see you guys round the corner for the next adventure!
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Dales, lakes and Mountains in England and Wales

5/26/2023

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It has been WARM, DRY and SUNNY! These 3 words are enough to help anyone living across the British isles break out a little smile. After a dark cold winter, we had a gloomy wet spring and now summer is finally upon us. Daytime temperatures are around 16 to 22 celcius which means we've packed away all our winter gear. It is now nice enough to head out in shorts and t-shirt. Best of all, it is still possible to enjoy the outdoors without soaking our clothes in sweat. 

We've clocked several hundred miles and travelled across the Yorkshire Dales, Lake District and Brecon Beacons. We've found ourselves exclaiming in immense joy and awe as we drive along tiny country roads. It is a feeling we haven't felt since we left Sapa, Vietnam and Cameron Highlands in Malaysia. Click here to read about all our other travels!

Now let's get to the fun parts!

SOUTH WALES (The Big Pit Coal Mine)
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We drove over 2 hours before we got to South Wales. I was telling the kids that we had entered another country in the same country. We had crossed borders without our passports! It is a very unique union we've got here in Britain. The drive into the hilly parts strained our car's little 1 litre engine and there were many sections where we had to get down to gear 2 before we could make progress. 

We had never gone down a mine shaft before and we definitely knew nothing about mining. The Big pit is an amazing destination that's both educational, reflective and enjoyable. We got our free underground tickets before we headed to a waiting area. 
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Our guides greeted us and brought us to a room to get kitted out with a special mining headlamp. The battery was strapped to our bodies and we had to wear a hard hat too. I was pleasantly surprised that they had equipment that fit children. They do weigh quite a few KGs but it was manageable even for Matt and Gwyn. We had to surrender ALL battery operated items because they can cause a spark and set off certain gases that the remaining coal may give off. All watches, car keys, mobile phones and cameras had to be put away on the surface before we took the "cage" down the shaft. 
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We got down 90m underground and was led through various tunnels, shown the equipment used and told about the dangers miners faced. It was both a fascinating experience and a really reflective one. At one point, the guide instructed us to all turn off our lamps and try to see our palms in front of us to illustrate the darkness miners experienced in Victorian times. Women, children and men who couldn't afford candles (yes they had to buy their own to work the mines) worked in absolute darkness. Horses that were used to pull carts stayed underground for the rest of their lives once they entered the mine. The immense hardship and dangers they faced in that darkness is absolutely shocking. 

Out of these "dark satanic mills", homes were warmed, trains had steam and ships sailed across oceans. The dirty coal as we call it today advanced civilisation. I applaud the Welsh government for preserving the coal mine and funding the museum. It is completely free to visit and I think that helps us put things into perspective. Yes, we need to care for our environment and use cleaner fuels but we also need to remember the sacrifices of those who came before us too. 
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We also got to ask many questions along the way and Gwyn asked the guide if she could try the tool that miners used to shovel coal into the cart. She got what she asked for! Her response was most hilarious "OH IT IS SO HEAVY! I don't think I can work here". I asked the guide how people did their "business" underground...he said "ANYWHERE!" and "sometimes they put a pile on the conveyor belts carrying coal up to the surface as a joke". Oh gosh....

We headed off to the mining simulator after we got back up to the surface. It was a light and sound show where machines from different eras come to life as miners shared their stories. A quick lunch later we headed off to scale the highest peak in South Wales. 

Pen y Fan

Measuring 886m above sea level, we thought it wouldn't be that tough to scale because our starting point was somewhere around 500m above sea level. The sun was out and the place looked absolutely gorgeous. 
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10 minutes into the hike the burn in our quads and calves became pretty real. The incline was pretty punishing for amateur hikers like us. The sun felt pretty hot but the wind was intense and cold. It wasn't the most pleasant of climbs but we pressed on. Along the way we met the real champions: the sheep. They scale the peaks in search of the best tasting grass and hang around with their friends on perilously steep sides of the mountain. Unaffected by the wind, they graze leisurely while we huffed and puffed our way up. 
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At around 780m just shy of the summit, the wind became very intense and the clouds blocked off the sunshine. Our muscles were crying out for a break. The children were increasingly whiny and it became clear we've reach our limit for the climb. We popped a few sandwiches into our tummies in that crazy wind and headed back down. The view was absolutely liberating. 
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so near yet so far
My ankles were sore and unstable for a few days after this climb and I realised that my boots didn't provide sufficient support. Wear proper hiking books with ankle support if you intend to climb here! The downhill is especially punishing on the joints because it very uneven and rocky on portions of the trail. 

We decided the next trip was to be a little more leisurely before we attempt anything like the Scafell pike (Highest point in England)...

Ribblehead Viaduct

Once we had recovered and stopped aching, we found our way to the Lake District via the Yorkshire Dales. The Ribblehead Viaduct is one of those scenic places that you can't miss in this area! Built between 1870 and 1874, this iconic viaduct cost more than 100 men their lives to build. It is still being used today!
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Windermere Lake, Brockhole on Windermere (Lake District)

Travelling with two kids also meant that we can't do much passive sight seeing for too long. They kids like to do things. These lively little ones prefer to be out there doing something that appeals to all their sense. We got to this amazing lake front destination and took a short stroll before we sat down to have a nice picnic by the waters. They also got to burn off some energy at the playground after a sugary snack and long car ride. 
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I mean just look at it. It is AMAZING! You don't have to pay an entrance fee to enjoy it and the kids aren't fussing about sweating buckets. If the day ended here, it would have been pretty satisfying already. Then we saw a sign "Boats, Kayaks and Paddle-boards for rent". I looked at Debra in the eye and we both agreed without a single spoken word that WE HAD TO GO ON THE LAKE IN A BOAT! I headed straight to the rental booth and asked if I needed a boat license to drive and they said I didn't need one. It was GAME ON. 

We paid £40 for an hour and they fitted us with life jackets of the right size before briefing us about the health and safety rules. 
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The kids were a little terrified in the beginning because it was their first time on an open top boat driven by their father haha! The kids were absolutely thrilled as we cruised along the lake. We kept checking with them if they were enjoying the activity and they said they were! They even suggested I buy a boat so we can do this again...ermm....

We didn't plan to do a boat ride because we didn't know we had this option but it turned out to be one of the best change of plans ever. We manage to catch a glimpse of the Wray Castle and the beautiful hills surrounding the picturesque lake. 
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What are your plans this summer?

​Let us know in the comments what would be fun for the kids. We are always open to new ideas! We are happy to connect via chat and social media channels too! 

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Walk on, Walk on with hope in your heart

5/1/2023

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One year ago in April 2022, we gave up all we've known to travel for 7 months across South-East Asia. (If you're interested and want to read those, click on the blog categories at the bottom of the page to see our travels by country!) We walked on through the wind, through the rain, through the tears, had our dreams tossed and blown. We tried to find healing for our grief and a way forward but nothing seemed to work. We tried out best to walk through the storms with our heads held high.

Life can be rough. In fact, it can be rough for an excruciatingly long time. It is so easy to lose sight of it all in a storm. But I hope that whatever your circumstances may be, you'll walk on. I hope you'll walk on with hope in your heart and that you'll never walk alone. 

We just said goodbye to April 2023 and it looks like we've finally seen off the worst of the storms. The shadows of the storms of life along with the gloomy bitterly cold winter has gone. We can finally see glimpses of the golden sky. We are here we are in the United Kingdom settled like we've been here forever. The kids are done with their semester of homeschooling, I've turned 12,500 words into turn-it-in while Debra has kept us all happy and alive with yummy grub. 

As you will notice with the pictures below, we've shedded the layers of thick clothing because t-shirt weather is finally starting to arrive. We've been so blessed by a couple of days of amazing sunshine and balmy 16-19 celcius weather. ​
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At the RAF Midlands Museum
With the deadlines sorted, I've had a lot more time to hit the motorways in search of places we can explore and enjoy. The kids didn't get their Easter or Mid-term breaks because I was really busy and we decided to have our schedules align. But now...they get a long break with me!

We got the ball rolling with the RAF Midlands museum that really gave us great insights into the history of human conflict. Matthias and I were excited to see the Spitfires and Messerschmitts and other historic aircraft we've watched about in documentaries. I can't say the same for the ladies. They are amazed at these planes and the stories behind them but they just don't have the same fascination with machines as the boys do. I don't mean to generalise what do you think?
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The legendary Spitfire
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Had the opportunity to tell Matt about the Vulcan bomber and the Cold War
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Stunning engineering
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The size of the bomb bay tells us how big the bombs were. It's not something we want to ever experience.
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Walking among the giants
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Flying free
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It's the playground!
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Flight officer Gwyn!

​We had the opportunity to visit an apple orchard in Cotswold this week. No luck with the apples because apple picking season is in summer so we still have a little bit of waiting to do. Having lived our entire lives in a city, we were absolutely clueless about the times crops are sown and harvested. We'll keep learning! We did manage to buy some apple juice and enjoyed a nature trek around the property. The cool air and warm sunshine made everything look so stunning. 
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Grabbed a map but got lost anyway...HAHA!
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No 4G/5G signals in the rural areas...can't believe how dependent on technology we have become...
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Fresh air, lush foliage, muddy boots and happy smiles!
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I'm just glad the children can now take a moment to pause and soak it in. I hope they'll remember to do it often in their lifetime ahead...
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The same plant at different stages. Reproduces asexually and doesn't need pollination so the new plant is EXACTLY the same. Basically clones itself. Mind blown!
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Of course the kids couldn't resist helping the Dandelions clone itself...
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Down SUPER narrow rural roads with cattle grids. Back in our happy place!
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Grey skies and bitterly cold days teach you to be grateful when you get beautiful days like that.

​For a person who takes cleanliness very very seriously (wifey reckons it is OCD...), I still can't decide if I like cleaning a salty, gritty, mucky car or one that's an insect graveyard. One thing for sure, the scenery is a feast for the senses and the soul.  It is worth cleaning the car for. 


With an abundance of daylight nowadays (Sun rises at 530am and sets at 830pm), it is a lot easier to plan days out. It is nice that we can drive home in the evenings and still make it home with daylight to spare. What a contrast from the 230pm sunsets just a few months ago. We managed a nature walk/farm visit + Cotswold (Bourton-on-the-water) in the same day! 
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12th century beauties.
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This anytime over a skyscraper.
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Getting ready for the coronation!
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Summer dresses, t-shirts and outside seating. Puts a smile on my face!
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Picnic by the river!
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Looking sad because we didn't let them jump into the river. (Water is still really cold actually...) They miss the water so much...the bathtub just doesn't cut it for them. We promised a beach trip when its warmer!
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Oh the glow!
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❤️
That's all for today's episode of our lives. We recognise that though we live pretty extraordinary lives, all we want is to savour the ordinary things. What you and l want is to experience love, our beautiful world and joy in our hearts. We hope our journey through grief, change and uncertainty resonates. We don't know when but we know there'd be better days. Press on and walk on with hope in your hearts.
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Home家

4/3/2023

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 家 (home) is a very peculiar mandarin character. The top part represents a roof and the bottom letter represents a pig. I'm inclined to think that the ancient Chinese person's home is where their most treasured roast pork is. There is perhaps much wisdom in this because the English speaking world would agree that home is where your heart is. ​
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Young, energetic and suddenly jaded.
I've be raised all my life to think that Singapore is my home. Compulsory education meant that I was taught the right brand of history, learnt the national education objectives and sang the national anthem every single day for 12 years. I was conscripted by law to an elite military unit for 2 years to defend the only "home" I knew. I thought I knew where home was. When I returned to Singapore in 2010 after my stint at Loughborough University, I suffered a severe identity crisis. All that I was taught and ever knew was suddenly questioned and I did not have the answers. 

Since then, I've tried explaining why I felt more at home in the UK. I was dismissed as an anglophile and a young man who doesn't know how lucky he was to be Singaporean. I've also been told many times to look at the strikes, the political "mess" and the statistics that condemn Britain as a shameful fallen empire. These people quote Singapore's GDP per capita, multi-million dollar properties, high HDB (public housing flat) ownership and highly ranked efficiency almost like a religious mantra to justify their pride of being Singaporean. The thing is, I am not questioning why you call Singapore home. 

The crisis is MINE. 

The questions are MINE. 
Home should MINE TO DEFINE.
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Home is where you thrive. 
Thriving is beyond just making money.
Thriving is about growing, learning, being a better person and being emotionally healthy. Thriving is also being kind to others, encouraging others and being wholesome.
Thriving is for those with exceptional abilities that don't fit in a prescribed schedule. 
Thriving is also for people with disabilities.
Thriving is for all personalities. 


13 years later in spring 2023, I am still trying to answer the questions and define what home is to me and my family. Here is a little portion of my recent thoughts...

HOME IS WHERE WE LEARN AND GROW
It has taken a whole new dimension now that I see my own children thriving in the UK. I see Gwyn getting excited about dance class, loving Sunday school and asking her homeschool parents for more work. She feels heard and understood and therefore She WANTS to learn. We are so grateful that she doesn't have to feel unduly pressured to perform. 

She greets me at the door when I get back to ask me, "Papa, what did you do at University today? What did you learn today?". She does it EVERYDAY. It touches my heart that she sees the importance of taking something away every time you go to class. I want our home and country to be one that protects and nurtures this attitude. ​
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The strongest desire to learn must also be met with the opportunity to do so. We are over the moon that Matthias is being mentored by a volunteer to be a radio presenter. He ran his first live show on a community radio station here in Leicester last weekend. The beauty of it all is that there are many others who are passionate about sharing their craft with others in and around the country. 

Learning is not about getting a grade or getting up a ranking table. Learning is not an unpleasant rite of passage to a job. We should learn zealously because we are infinitely curious and passionate of a certain craft/field. If it leads to a good vocation, that's a bonus. If it doesn't, the attitude itself will set us on a good path wherever we choose to venture. This is not a predominant belief where I grew up. ​
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​HOME IS WHERE THE SPACE AND CLIMATE PROMOTES GOOD HEALTH
I think it is hard to call a place home if the climate brings you an incredible amount of distress and health issues. British people moan about the rain, snow, sleet and gloomy skies all the time but we'd rather have these than being a sweaty mess in extreme humidity all day long. When the sun comes out, many like us are compelled to head out there and make the best of the sunshine. It encourages us to exercise and get outdoors. 

And when we do get outdoors, we are always given a huge boost of endorphins. Being able to go trekking without being completely drenched in sweat makes us want to walk more, climb more and play more. There's trees to climb, sticks to pick and rocks to scale. We come home happy and do not have to worry about an eczema flare up. ​
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Beacon Hill, Leicestershire
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Even when the temperature is just a single digit, we still need our ice-cream fix!
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Magnolias
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Cherry blossoms outside my window...
Seeing the seasons change and flowers bloom must be one of the biggest highlights of our time here. We really don't mind a home where we are surrounded by a lively natural environment that isn't a curated concrete man-made place. In fact, this has grown our desire to learn about and appreciate the nature around us. It is such a wholesome experience! 

I've also mentioned in our previous blog posts about how we are more able to find gluten-free grocery and dining options here. Allergies are taken very seriously and they never have to feel left out when snacks are given out. You can't feel at home if food around you is making you feel constantly unwell can you?

HOME IS WHERE THERE'S KINDNESS

Our kids have had crazy amount of fun playing with other children they have met for the first time.  I have witnessed groups of kids readily stop their game and give a Gwyn a go at the football/ basketball. Some of them were complete strangers. Our kids don't get strange stares when they initiate play or a conversation here. It just feels so wholesome that children can be children and not grow up with a constant wall of defence against some perceived threat. They way kids play (or don't play) reflects a huge deal about the home and country they live in. 

I don't want to paint the UK as some kind of heaven. It isn't.
But if I really have to compare the road cultures, it has been heavenly here.

Most people give way to others. Put on your indicators in Singapore, it is almost likely that the car behind will cut you off. People in the opposite direction use their high beams to say, I'm slowing down for you, you can go ahead and turn. In Singapore, high beam is used to maliciously blind the person in front because they have offended you in some way. ​
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It has been such a joy driving around even though I only drive a tiny little Citroen.
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​People let their hazard lights blink twice here to say thank you. In Singapore, it is quite often used when you are pretending to stop due to hazards but is fact brake checking someone. The horn is rarely used here unless there's real danger or in a very occasional moment of rage. In Singapore, it's the quintessential way of saying "f*** off" on the roads daily. 


Way more patience, way more kindness, way less stressed. That's how a home should be, no?

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The idea of home is a very personal one. Considering what are the most important aspects of home can be very beneficial. It could change the culture in your house, it could change the path of your family and it can start a quest like how it did for us. What's your idea of home? ​
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Loving the farm and countryside

2/6/2023

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Why the countryside? 
Yes, it is in the middle of nowhere but it is also the center of it all. The countryside is where our food comes from and it is where we can run away to seek refuge from our stressful lives. It is food for both the soul and stomach. 


More than 25 years ago, my dad brought the family for a vacation on a farm in rural South Australia. A little Singaporean city boy who knew nothing but a concrete jungle all his life was suddenly staying in a little cottage on a piece of land so vast he could see the nothing but fields stretching all the way to the horizon. I was ecstatic that I was free to run around (and not sweat because it was winter), sit around a fire and go shoot hares at night with the big boys. Yes, it was dusty, muddy, cold and we battled the houseflies. Those were worthy inconveniences for the liberation I felt. My love for the countryside deepened even further during my last stint in the UK.

Now that we're back, I try my best to do the same for my family. We jump into our little hatchback and drive out of our village into the country or farm when the weather gods are happy to bestow us a precious dry and sunny winter's day. We were so blessed to have one of those days at Stonehurst farm in Mountsorrel (A village north of Leicester City near Loughborough) yesterday.

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A fine winter's day in Leicestershire!
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Simple pleasure of taking a ride around the fields on a tractor
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Sitting on hay bales. To be honest it was quite comfortable!
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It is so nice to be outside!
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You probably won't be this excited to drive a manual vehicle haha!
COURAGE, KNOWLEDGE AND HEART RATE

Those who have stuck with us for the past 6 years would know that Hiro & Jack are the names of our late guinea pigs. They lived long lives (5 and 8 years) and we loved them to bits. Our human kids literally learned how to walk by holding themselves up with the guinea pig cage. They talked to the guinea pigs, stroked them and fed them. But somehow they became very fearful of animals after the piggies passed on and after two years of the pandemic madness. 

​We've been trying our best to help them overcome that fear. They did pick up courage to stroke cats/dogs while we traveled last year. This visit to the farm surprised us at what being outdoors can do to the confidence in kids. 
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He surprised all of us today by asking to pet the guinea pig on his lap...
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And then asked to ride the pony...
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She would RUN away if this was last year! It is surprising what just two months of village life, countryside walks and farm visits can do!
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Debra was the only one brave enough to let the cow lick food off her palm. Oh the slobber....
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No guinea pig can resist a cheek rub! Oh I miss my piggies...

​We also took the opportunity to explain our relationship with animals to the kids. I think it is important to let the kids know that some of these animals work for us and others are our food. It is important that we raise, work and slaughter them humanely. It is easy in our city lives to be completely disconnected from these realities because all we see are chicken nuggets and fish fingers. People should understand that they should never waste food because the farmers work really hard and we take lives of animals to put food on the table. 
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A visit outdoors won't be complete without getting the heart rate up! Mine went up when I saw the amount of sand/hay stuck on their clothes and shoes (which means it will find its away into my car and house....)

Growing up in a home and city that's compulsively cleaned, it is hard to do otherwise. Keeping up obsessively with cleaning/tidying can be anxiety inducing and very unhealthy. Being in the countryside teaches me to be less compulsive with desiring a perfectly clean house and car. The cold air and calm natural surroundings takes my anxiety away. Nature teaches me that it is okay to have some mess. 
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THE GODS MUST BE CRAZY

A few weeks back, we took the kids on a very exciting first farm visit in the UK. Meteorological service said that there was no chance of rain or snow. The sky outside looked sunny and we decided to give it a go. We headed to 
Windmill farm located in the south of Leicestershire between Leicester and Market Harborough. When we arrived at the farm and checked out a few animals, it started drizzling. Oh! This is as British as it can get! So we thought....
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It started off overcast and little wet...
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Yes they feed the chickens leftover Christmas trees.
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The Mallards were also unaware of what's coming next too...
Without warning....this happened....
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People living in the tropics will ask, what's the difference between snowfall and sleet falling? Snow is frozen ice crystal, it falls as a flake or in clumps of flakes. Sleet is kinda wet and partially melted. There are many different forms of snow and it falls in a number of ways. We were so blessed to have experienced 3 in a row! 

We were all smiles but it was getting colder and so we headed inside to warm up by coffee, hot chocolate and soft-play. 
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We haven't had much playground time because the playground is wet or frozen most days
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A very massive playground...
Once we've warmed up, we headed back out to see the animals in the barn. I like farms because we get to be up close with the animals. I even managed to observe different parenting styles among the sheep and their lambs. Some just eye-balled their lambs when the little ones walk away from them. Some just follow at a distance. It was hilarious I even managed to observe a helicopter parent sheep that made sure she followed her child's every step and pushed others out of the way to protect the lamb. 
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What's a visit to the farm without stepping out in the fields right? Only this time the field was rather frozen, snowy and muddy. We had a long, mindful, quiet and relaxing stroll around the fields. All we could hear was the crunching of snow and ice under our boots. Just look at how beautiful it is...
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What is the farm and countryside effect you may ask? In a world of instant gratification via endless scrolling on our screens, looking beyond ourselves is a very important exercise. It really helps to have wholesome experiences out there in the fields and farms  that ground us and reconnect us to nature and ourselves. Feeling stressed lately? Kids addicted to their devices? Try the countryside, nature reserve, seaside and great outdoors today!
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Skeletons tell a story

1/30/2023

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Faster, better and newer is the only way we've been told. Life is lived by treading the narrow lane of doing only what makes you profits, gives you savings and advances your overall career or wealth. We've rejected that very early on with our odd life. We chose a line of work that allowed us to homeschool our kids and worked from home long before the pandemic happened. We chose the road, our mental health and building a core memory with our children. 

The "skeletons" of the UK keep reminding us of why we've made this huge move across the globe. We chose this life so we have the freedom to preserve memories and form our identities beyond the prescribed way of life.

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Oxford, England
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One of many antique shops
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One of many antique shops

​I recall when dad first retired, he would spend his days cycling to places around Singapore. He would take long bus rides from one end of the island to another. He would also come home and lament how the Singapore he knew is no longer around. He would tell us of the places he formed great memories at and how they have disappeared. I felt that it was his way of reconnecting with the land and his surroundings after more than 40 years of work that occupied so much of his time. But his attempt at reconnection only brought out a sad sense of disconnect. I was then only in my early 30s but his experience resonated deeply with me. So many places that defined my childhood have been torn down in favour of the newer and better. It explains my own disconnect with the supposed "home" country. 
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No one uses a telephone booth anymore but it is kept as part of the landscape for memory's sake.
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Oxford City Centre
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Since 1450. FIVE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY THREE YEARS OLD. Still intact and in use today.

​Old places, things and buildings give us a sense of stability in our identity and acts as a reference point for us. The sense of place forms our identities, sometimes personally and sometimes as a collective. When I first stepped foot in Britain and the rest of Europe, I observed how they have kept vast amounts of old buildings and archived artefacts in museums. You can find a museum for anything from transportation, space, natural history, art, science, astrology to lawnmowers. (There's really a British Lawnmower Museum  in Southport!) Debra and I often laugh about how the Brits are such hoarders because they keep and preserve everything.

We visited Oxford for an afternoon last weekend and the realisation hit me like a freight train. These worthless "Skeletons" that are preserved do tell a story. That story is continuously told to generations and beyond if we preserve, display and teach about them. Museums, old buildings, old things and skeletons are important because they are depositories of our collective cultural and historical identities. They make us, us. 


Preservation of heritage is not just a frivolous nostalgic exercise.
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Warden's Lodgings, Oxford
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Kebel College, Oxford
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Wadham College, Oxford
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Sheldonian Theatre/Exeter College, Oxford

​It dawned upon me that these places we visit and form memories at will still exist when I'm long dead. Matthias could be walking into Oxford University Museum of Natural History in 2083 with his grandchildren, recounting his childhood running down the hall of a building opened in 1860 with his sister Gwyn. There in an instance, an invisible thread connects 4 generations, their memories and their ties with the land. 
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Oxford University Museum of Natural History
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Oxford University Museum of Natural History (Entrance)
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Ancient design with a modern twist
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Just look at this architecture

​We had a magical afternoon hearing the stories these skeletons and buildings of several hundred years speak to us. We know that we are all gaining knowledge, creating memories and forming our identities. 

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Sorting fossils and leaves
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So special that the kids are allowed to hold and physically sort the fossils
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Dinosaur detective!
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Checking out the T-rex
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All glories pass away.
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Family!
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It's an amusing sight isn't it? Two (formerly) ferocious creatures and a bunch of adorable kids enjoying themselves.
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Some creatures can be quite frightening. Just glad they don't exist anymore....
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You are just reminded how tiny and helpless we really are as a species without our gadgets. A little like Iron man?
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Some of our more recent friends in skeleton form.
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The sign said "touch me" so we felt a bear for the first time in our lives
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the fox too...
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Otters have the softest fur EVER.
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Hanging out with the greats all around the hall. Statues do more than just decorate a space. They help generations remember people.

​We were also excited to find some ancient Egyptian artefacts and other artefacts that helped us make sense of history. How did writing come about? What is embalming? It is one thing reading about it, it is another seeing, hearing, being physically present and touching something as a process of learning.  Both kids were never fond of museums before we came to Britain. They are now excited about going to one because they make their books and Horrible Histories show come alive. 

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Irterau
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He is most excited about having hearts weighed upon death to find out if the person was good or bad haha!
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Who knows a few generations from now if we'd even be holding a pen to write anymore.

​What are your thoughts? How important is preserving heritage to you? 

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We say, keep the skeletons (old buildings, places and artefacts too!) and let them speak wondrous stories to generations. 
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Surviving the Winter

1/16/2023

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Hello there! We are so glad you're back here with us in 2023! We really hope 2023 is being kind to you wherever you are! I can't be more grateful to be another year older surrounded by the people I love dearly. 
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Here in our little village (oh yes we found out our area is considered a village and that makes us villagers HAHA!), we've been finding our footing in a very different environment and climate. We talked about the shocking truths of living in the UK here in our last post but I think we are only starting to grasp the power of nature and its ability to shape our lives.

We've spent most of our lives along the equator of the planet on a geographically sheltered island (Singapore). Nothing really happens in terms of weather because it is either rain or shine. Shorts, T-shirt and slippers works 365 days a year. Occasionally, the temperature dips to about 21-22 celcius and you'll see people flooding social media with pictures of being all wrapped up and feeling "cold". The past month has redefined the word "cold" for all of us.
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Winter is not a season, it is an occupation - Sinclair Lewis 

I think Sinclair Lewis is quite right in saying that it is an occupation because winters are to be endured and there's a lot to do if you want to live well in winter. 

Winters are to be endured


A short nice ski/winter holiday may actually sound exciting but living through the entirety of winter is a completely different ball game. I know I run the risk of sounding like a wimp because there are many who live further north in Scotland, Canada, Russia and the Nordic countries who experience far more brutal winters than we are getting here in the UK. To survive winters, you've got to endure the biting cold, the constant darkness, being stuck indoors, spending way more money on energy bills.

When we do get a break in the weather (e.g. the sun comes out and it isn't raining, sleeting, hailing and snowing), we try our best head outside. It can be frustrating being stuck inside all the time. It can also be miserable shaking in the cold. I do my best to head to places that have the great outdoors and a heated indoor space to take refuge when it gets too cold. 
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Wollaton Hall and Deer Park, Nottingham
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Stunning architecture
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Stunning landscape and outdoors
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Warmer and sheltered from the cold winds inside among the museum exhibits
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Winters help shrink our egos. It reminds us that there's something larger than us. This African elephant tusk also reminded us quite literally.
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Leicester Museum and Art Gallery
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Maybe that's why people painted so much in the past? It's bitterly cold outside and they had no Netflix...

​The kids are showing a lot less stamina in the cold and would complaint about wanting to go home. The ironic thing is, the only way to overcome the cold is to go into the cold. Our bodies need time to adjust the way it responds to the cold and if we simply stay home all day, we'll never adjust. If you'd really want to survive the winter, you must endure the cold and head outside. 
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Abbey Park, Leicester
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Walking among the ruins
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Sights like that takes your mind away from the cold
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I cannot imagine how cold the birds, ducks and swans are in that frigid water.
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They dunk their heads underwater to search for food...absolute legends because I am dry and already can't feel my fingers.
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All Saints Church, Wigston Magna
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Built between 1280 - 1320
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Stood the test of time and bitterly cold winters
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​Days are very short in winter and it can be very disorientating when you've got only 6-7 hours of daylight. Perpetual darkness can make you very lethargic because the absence of light tells your body it is time to sleep/rest. Lack of vitamin D also puts you at a way higher risk of serious health problems and depression. Cabin fever can also set in when you are stuck indoors too much. We try to take in as much fresh air and sunlight as we possibly can to keep ourselves sane. 


There's a lot to do if you want to live well in winter

Here's how we get an outing done in the winter. 

-Check Meteorological office for adverse warnings
-Watch BBC weather report
-Check road closures
-Check winter operating hours
-Slap a lot of cream on your skin
-Pack the snack pack and prepare water/warm flask
-Dress up (Tee, sweater, coat, gloves, beanie, jeans/stockings, warm socks, boots, scarf) 
-Repeat dress up 2 more times for the kids 
-Scrape the ice off the windscreen, windows and mirrors
-Some people have to first shovel snow away to get moving
-Turn on the car window defoggers and wait for the condensation to go away before you can see well enough to get going. 

In Singapore, we'd get out of bed and walk out of the house in pyjamas (tee shirt and running shorts). Call Grab or just pick food up at a 24hr eatery. It will always be fast and convenient. You would expect nothing less than that. 

Winters don't give you that luxury. It is messy, uncomfortable and hard work. Winters bring ice that make roads extremely dangerous and difficult to drive on.  There will be no deliveries, people can't get to work, businesses shut, all forms of transport halts and life comes to a standstill. You'd really need to be very aware of weather developments and prepare for disruptions. If you don't stock your food/fuel ahead of an adverse weather warning, you are going to be cold, hungry and miserable. 

Such disruptions don't happen on a daily basis but there's always a possibility and it takes effort to be prepared. 
We are looking at temperatures hovering around -5 to 5 over the next two weeks. It is going to be colder than the milder 8-12 degrees we've been getting. There's a possibility we will get frost, snow and ice. We have put fuel into the car and stocked our fridge twice this week in anticipation for that freeze that's on its way!


Just 6 more weeks before spring

As much as we are looking forward to the next season, we do our best to enjoy the winter. I think that is one of the most effective way to survive winter - enjoy it! 
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A hot coffee, tea or chocolate warms your entire being!
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If an ice cream is your thing, why not? (Look at that smile)
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A good book in a warm bed is a great way to enjoy winter.
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Yummy cakes and many warm hugs help too!
As we steadied ourselves the strong wind around Foxton Locks along the Grand Union Canal in Leicestershire last weekend, I reminded everyone that we are not soaking our  clothes wet with sweat while enjoying the great outdoors. We are not bloated nor feeling sticky. We are still enjoying the beautiful sights!
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Fascinating engineering to bring the narrowboats from canals on higher to lower ground (vice versa)
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Water is levelled between two locks before the doors open for the boats to carry on
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A narrowboat
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It isn't history for the locks because it is a functioning one! Still being used today.
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They just love running about and then fall asleep in the car...
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all wrapped up our little (spicy) dumpling
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All smiley because Man United beat Man City!!!
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oh! the green and pleasant land.
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Bridges over calm waters
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Amazing views. The cafe serves amazing food too!
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We enjoyed the day out!

​We are really grateful that after any good long walk, we will be absolutely ravenous. That means our food tastes better and gives us more satisfaction! 


Yes it is disruptive, uncomfortable, a lot of work and dangerous at times but like any occupation, we are grateful for what it gives us. Winters can and do bring great satisfaction as well as enjoyment.

You can't get rainbows without the rain. You can't have the amazing four seasons without winter. 
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The shocking truths about life in Britain

12/30/2022

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8 out of 12 months of year 2022 has been spent not living from a place of permanent abode. Needless to say, it feels extremely foreign that we now have a place to call home and come back to every night. For the first time since April, we've unpacked our luggage and they sit empty while the wardrobes are filled. I think more than the comfort of living a more settled state of life, we rejoice that we are back where our hearts yearned for so much. For 10 years since the last time we were here, we longed for the day we would come back. If you were to tell me in January that we would be back in December, I would have probably felt that you were making some kind of sick joke.

Dreams aside, there is a stark difference between living and travelling in a country. As we complete setting up home here in the UK, we took stock of our lives and uncovered some shocking truths about living here.
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Extra layers to stay warm while watching TV. It's easy to become cold when you're stationary!
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​SHOCKING TRUTH #1

Direct income taxes for regular folks is between 20-30%. Higher earners pay 45%. Income taxes are way higher than what we are used to in Singapore.

SHOCKING TRUTH #2
Due to Putin's war, Europe now faces an extremely difficult energy/cost of living crisis. It can cost up to £500 (SGD800) for the monthly gas bill alone. Most people heat homes with gas boilers and there are people who can't afford to even turn on the gas anymore.  We've had to turn our heating down from 21-22 celcius to 17-18 celcius because we realised the bill was going to be quite astronomical. This cut the bill by more than 50% but it also means we have to put on an additional layer! There's enough hardship in this world, we really don't need anyone to add to that...

SHOCKING TRUTH #3
Strikes are legal and they do happen. For Singaporeans of my generation, the word strike is what moms threaten us with when we mess up the house and take her work for granted. Other than that, it is almost a dirty word to utter in public. 

​Strikes can mean no train services, no bus services and even reduced staffing in hospitals etc. But this is how society here achieves equilibrium on the scale of work and pay.


SHOCKING TRUTH #4
Despite the cost of living crisis here, your grocery bill in Singapore is DOUBLE of what we pay here. So it must be a cost of living catastrophe in Singapore. 

Milk costs SGD$2.23 for two litres. (In SG: $5.95 to $6.50)
Broccoli costs SGD$0.30 for 375g. (In SG: $3 for 250g Aussie broccoli)
Fresh loaf of Gluten free bread SGD$3.15 (In SG: $12-15)
Fresh Chicken thighs 2kgs SGD6.30 (In SG: $14 and above)

Rice is so far the only thing we found expensive to buy here. ($17-20 for 5kg). 
Almost every vegetable, fruit, cereal, meat, dairy and sauce is cheaper. We were absolutely shocked because we thought we had a chain of supermarkets that is a social enterprise. It is supposed to be FAIRprice?
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SHOCKING TRUTH #5
Eating out costs a bomb here in UK. An average fast food meal costs £25 for 4 people (SGD42.50). We really can't just grab our phones and order a take out. Eating out/taking out is for special occasions or just once or twice a month affair. We cook or bring sandwiches whenever we can! 

SHOCKING TRUTH #6
Your average 4 room HDB flat can buy you 3 flats or 1.5 Semi Detached houses here in Britain. You can buy a 3 bedroom suburban maisonette flat for less than SGD150,000 in midland cities (1.5 hours from London by rail). Most of these are also freehold. 

SHOCKING TRUTH #7
Public transport costs SGD2.50 for a single trip here in Leicester. The maximum charge in London for an entire day of rides is about SGD14.30. People walk when your destination is a stop or two. Renting a public bicycle also makes sense.

SHOCKING TRUTH #8
You can buy an old but reliable runabout car for under SGD5000 (including one year of road tax, insurance and general maintenance). It is yours to drive FOREVER.

SHOCKING TRUTH #9
Healthcare is FREE. (Permanent residents and Citizens) Foreigners who reside in the UK on a visa usually pay a one-time health surcharge when getting your visa and are also then treated for free. 

Yes you are treated for free for all hospitalisations, A&E visit, specialist visits, whether you require cancer treatment or brain surgery. Small charges like prescriptions do cost for outpatients. But it is a fixed cost of £108.10 for an entire year. 


SHOCKING TRUTH #10
It rains 159 out of 365 days here in the UK. It rains 167 out of 365 days in Singapore. So I don't understand why UK gets the reputation for being miserably dark and wet.
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And the point of pointing out these shocking truths is to challenge our preconceived notions about other countries. All throughout our travels we've realised that people can have very little and still feel contented. People can have a lot and yet feel like they have nothing. There are people in Britain who cannot afford to heat their homes, there are people in Singapore who cannot afford to buy nutritious food for their children and many others worldwide who are unnecessarily burdened by the rising costs of fuel. 

​We can be thankful for what we have and never stop trying to make life better for ourselves and those around us. An act of kindness can go a long long way. 
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HOW IS LIFE THEN?

Shocking truths aside, we've been trying to squeeze an outing here and there between the winter showers. We try out best not to complain about the weather even though it is very British do so. 
It really beats perspiring and getting eczema flare ups!

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The weather is wet, windy and cold but our hearts are so full and warm. You hear me saying that very often but it is real. 

The wide and open spaces are what we came here for! Deep in my heart, the green and pleasant land is one of the greatest pull factors about Britain. Having grown up in a city that flattens its forests and historical places rapidly, these things have become very very precious to me. ​​
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It's nice to look towards the horizon and not see a building.
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Just a deer doing deer things.
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The clouds here make the best black and white pictures!

​In all our travels, we've learnt of the healing powers of nature. It is a blessing to go into the woods, breathe fresh air, not perspire and walk free. It is an immensely freeing experience to only hear the sounds of nature and see the animals roam.

We also took the opportunity to take the kids to the Great Central Railway in Loughborough. (Read as "Luffbra") It is one of those places I would ride my bicycle to and watch the steam trains go by in my undergraduate days. When I got married, I took my wife to the same steam railway not expecting her to enjoy any of the geeky outdated antiques. But she saw my perspective of how it is important to preserve old things. It connects us with our history, it roots us and it incredibly comforting to return to a place you know will remain the same. 
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I'm grateful beyond words that I was able to visit this place as a single man, a married couple and now as a father of two. Perhaps visiting this railway could be our new Christmas tradition for all future generations! You can see the train move on our Instagram page: www.instagram.com/hiroandjack
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This beauty was built in 1959.
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SHEEEEEEP!
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Already eyeing the January "Paw Patrol" event!
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Someone drew that!
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HOW ARE THE KIDS ADJUSTING?

These shocking truths don't really affect the kids as much as their parents who have to make the pounds and pence work out. They are getting used to the cold but learning is business as usual. They get their daily dose of regular English, Math, Tamil and Science along with age appropriate TV programmes on the BBC.

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It is one thing reading about steam power and another to experiencing it happening before you. The kids are amazed at how that huge machine actually comes alive. That's how we try to make it fresh and exciting for them. The sense of wonder fuels lifelong learning. Not skills future credits. We need to rekindle our own sense of wonder so that we'll WANT to learn! It shouldn't be out of desperation to keep a job but should be out of a genuine desire to pursue knowledge. 

HOW ARE THE GROWN UPS ADJUSTING?

We are getting back the hang of cooking our own yummy food, loving football and having to vacuum clean the house. So far I've also been quite successful at trying not stall our little manual hatchback because most cars here in UK are stick shift (manual gearbox). 
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Yummy Christmas dinner!
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It's on the radio, tele, newspapers and everywhere. The UK is perfect for a football fanatic!
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GOODBYE 2022

We dared not expect 2022 to end the way it has. It feels good to be grounded again. As the year draws to a close, we have a little more reason to look forward to the new year with optimism and hope. We wish the same for you.

Thank you for being around in 2022! We hope you'll stick around and continue to journey with us in our odd lives next year. 

​We pray you'll have a very joyous year ahead with a lot of hugs, kisses and time spent with your loved ones. 

Signing off for 2022. 
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